TeenHealthFX - Answers - Cutting At 13

Cutting / Question
Published: November 26, 2002

Dear TeenHealthFX,

About 2 years ago, I started cutting, at first with my fingernails, then knifes, each getting sharper as I went on. I want help, but I don't, do you know what I mean. I don't want to die, I will tell you that. Some people say that when you cut, you want to die. Well, that is not the case with me. My friends say I might hurt myself horribly if I keep doing that. They told me that when they found out, they looked on every single cutting site to find out how to help me. A few weeks ago, I was watching TV and started cutting w/o totally knowing I was doing it. I had a slight inkling, but I didn't try to stop myself in the least bit. I had just picked up the X-ACTO knife I usually use and was cutting. When I looked at the cut, I noticed I had carved the name of a friend who moved somewhere else. One night, I stabbed myself a few times, drawing much blood, but not enough to die. I know this is long, but I just wanted to explain what happened to me. I want help, but I don't. What I really want more than to stop is to have someone to talk to about this. I am starting to feel as if it is not worth it any more. I think my friends are starting to give up on me...

Signed: Cutting At 13

Dear Cutting At 13,

FX is glad that you want to talk to someone about your cutting. It sounds like you need to get help ASAP as your "cutting" has reached dangerous levels (i.e., stabbing and using an X-ACTO knife).

The first step in finding someone to talk to is to let your parents know what is going on. It may be difficult to do, but once they understand the severity of your situation, they will want to get you help. You can show them this question/answer from FX if you think it will make it easier to explain your situation. If this is impossible, you still need to tell an adult, like a guidance counselor or school nurse. They can help get you into professional treatment and this can give you someone to talk to.

FX knows that you said that you do not want to die and we are glad. Your life is important. FX does need to warn you though that cutting; especially stabbing can lead to serious injury. Along with serious injury, cutting can lead to infections. You need to stop or at least find help ASAP. An adult can get you to a therapist. A therapist can talk to you about your problems and concerns. Also, they will help you develop healthy ways of coping with life events that can replace the cutting behavior.

If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern New Jersey you can also call the crisis hotline from Morristown Memorial hospital at 973-540-0100. Outside this area call the Suicide & Crisis Hotline, 1-800-999-9999, 24 hours, 7 days a week

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.

For some additional information about self-injury you can check this link: Self-Abuse Finally Ends (S.A.F.E.) Alternatives. Also, FX recommends seeing our "Cutting" category under the Emotional Health category for questions similar to yours.

Signed: TeenHealthFX