Depression / Question
Published: June 27, 2006
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I feel empty and I'm a 15-year-old male. All my other male friends have girlfriends but me. It’s aggravating because they are always flirting around with their girlfriends, and I feel neglected. When it comes to girls I’m always the "nice guy" or they say "your like a brother to me". My mom claims that I’m a slacker and that I never do my work but how would I be getting all A's if I wasn’t working. She makes me feel like crap even when I do good things and all she ever points out are bad things and never any good things. I feel like I’m hated and I often sit for long periods of time and ponder my place in this world. I feel lost and confused. And I feel deep sadness and I feel miserable when I’m sitting at home on Saturday and Friday nights doing nothing with no one. Am I depressed is this depression? Feeling like no one really cares? That I’m an inferior human?
Signed: Am I Depressed?
Dear Am I Depressed?,
TeenHealthFX is sorry to hear that you find that you are often feeling sad, like nobody cares about you, and like “an inferior human being.” It certainly is not a pleasant way to be living, to say the least. And FX can understand that feeling so poorly about yourself would also make dating very hard for you – it is generally hard to pursue romantic relationships, or imagine that others would want to pursue us for a dating relationship, when we feel negatively about ourselves.
While FX cannot guarantee a definitive diagnosis over the Internet as to whether or not you are dealing with depression, it is possible as you do have some of the symptoms of depression. Some symptoms of depression include:
- Depressed or irritable mood
- Temper/ agitation
- Loss if interest in previously enjoyed activities and reduced pleasure in daily activities
- Sudden change in appetite or weight
- Sleep disturbance – oversleeping or difficulties falling asleep
- Often feeling fatigued
- Difficult concentrating and with decision making
- Memory loss
- Preoccupation with self
- Feeling worthless or experiencing feelings of self-hatred
- Excessive or inappropriate feelings of guilt
- Acting out behaviors (missing curfews, unusual defiance, etc.)
- Thoughts of suicide or obsessive fears about death
- Plans to commit suicide or an actual suicide attempt
- Excessively irresponsible behavior pattern
FX recommends that you meet with a mental health professional that can evaluate whether or not you may be dealing with depression. If you do have depression, this person could then work with you to formulate an effective treatment plan, which may include some or a combination of the following:
- Individual therapy – Focus on raising awareness as to what contributes to your negative moods and thoughts, as well as ways to develop healthier coping mechanisms. Set up goals in terms of what you would like to be different in your life, and then receive support and guidance as you work towards those goals.
- Medication management – Anti-depressant medication to help elevate your mood.
- Family therapy – Education for you and your parents about depression and effective courses of treatment. Help for your parents in terms of them having a better understanding of what contributes to your depressed mood, as well as teaching them ways in which they can be more helpful and supportive of you during this time.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 973-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
