Depression / Question
Published: November 10, 2008
Dear TeenHealthFX,
okay; ive read most of your answers here and i think i may be a victim of depression. often i get really sad for no reason, other times i feel miserable over alot of things that are going on in my life. when i was little my dad walked out.i was too young to understand it; but now its causing me alot of pain. about a year and a half ago. i found out that he wasnt a very good person and he did some really bad things;which is why he left. i dont know why but that has me in a state where i just feel miserable and i dont even really know him. my mom never wants to talk about it and never seems to want to help me through it. and then i have a stepdad and hes really mean and bossy; he always thinks hes right and im wrong. he always starts fights with me. he cusses at me and screams at me and when he does my mom usually stops him i know hes part of the problem but my mom wont listen and ive told her about me being depressed and she doesnt take me seriously; i started to get really depressed about it halfway through grade 7 im in grade 9 now; i dont think its "just a phase" last summer; i basically isolated myself from the world, i didnt hang out with friends anymore; didnt spend time with the family; i just kept to myself up in my room. now i go to the movies and hang out with friends and stuff that summer was just..i never want to feel like that again; i felt so alone. when im with friends hanging out i seem okay most of the time, but my friends tell me i dont seem to be with them sometimes. i have considered suicide before, but ive never attemped it. i just feel really miserable right now i cant take it.
Signed: Feel Really Miserable And Can't Take It
Dear Feel Really Miserable And Can't Take It,
TeenHealthFX can appreciate that you are feeling miserable right now as you are dealing with some really difficult stressors and family situations. To not have had your father in your life growing up and then to find out negative things about who he was as a person, to feel like you cannot turn to your mother for comfort and support with this, and then to have a conflictual relationship with your step-father – these are all extremely tough things to be dealing with.
FX thinks that it is important that you participate in individual and family therapy. Your individual therapy can help you to address the feelings you have about your father leaving the family when you were young and about whatever you know about him in terms of his not being a good person. Your own therapy can also help you to develop healthy coping mechanisms to deal with these situations and any negative feelings that come up for you. Family therapy would also be helpful in terms of addressing the relationship issues between you, your mother, and your step-father – helping you to feel you can rely more on your mother for emotional support and helping to reduce the tension and conflict between you and your step-father.
Even though you are dealing with some very difficult situations, keep in mind that things can get better. And one of the most important steps in helping things to get better is to reach out to the adults around you who are caring and trustworthy so that you have positive people to turn to for guidance and support. Whether therapists, school counselors, teachers, neighbors, extended family members of whomever else – make sure you have grown-ups who will be there for you and who will help you in trying to deal with the issues you are having with your father, mother, and step-father.
If you live in northern
If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern
Signed: TeenHealthFX
30% of teens with depression also have a substance abuse problem.
