TeenHealthFX - Answers - I Got Raped By Her Brother

Sexual Assault & Rape / Question
Published: July 2, 2003

Dear TeenHealthFX,

Okay. I graduated from high school this year, and I'm looking forward to go to college in August. But I have a big problem now. I went over my friend's house about 3 months ago, and her brother raped me. I didn't tell anyone about it and now my parents found out that I'm pregnant now and they're Christians, so they don't want me to abort my baby. I do want to keep him too, but I don't want to take one year off for college because of it, and I'm not sure I should keep this baby or not because I know I won't be able to handle it, and also I don't think anybody would like me anymore if I have a kid. But I'm scared of getting abortion too. I don't know what to do. Please help!

Signed: I Got Raped By Her Brother

Dear I Got Raped By Her Brother,

TeenHealthFX is very concerned about you - you a lot to deal with right now between being raped, being pregnant and going off to college. We have a few recommendations for you:

Take care of your physical self - see your doctor for a complete exam and let him/her know that you have been raped and are pregnant. Your doctor will check you out for STDs and confirm your pregnancy. Ask your doctor for a referral to an obstetrician-gynecologist (ob/gyn) for prenatal care during your pregnancy. If you do not have a doctor and live in northern New Jersey, you can call the Adolescent/Young Adult Center for Health at 973.971.6475 for an appointment. If you live outside of this area, you can call your local teen health center or your local Planned Parenthood.
Get rape counseling - being raped is very traumatic and there are special services to help rape victims in most states. There are people out there that can help you to lighten the emotional load and deal with some of the anger and pain that you are carrying with you. A counselor or a psychiatrist who is trained in working with victims of sexual assault will help you deal with all your issues surrounding the rape (including reporting the crime of rape, your feelings, your family's and friend's feelings and reactions, etc.). In addition, you can call or log onto the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAIN) for more information about sexual assault. They can be reached at (800) 656.HOPE (4673). You can also call the Atlantic Behavioral Health Center at (888) 247.1400 for a referral to services in your area.
Decide what you want to do with your pregnancy as the decision is yours. It sounds like you have decided not to have an abortion. Your other options are adoption and keeping the child. Your rape counselor can help you work through and discuss all the options and help you decide for yourself, which is the best course of action for you. If you decide that adoption is something you want to pursue, your counselor can refer you to a reputable adoption agency. Being pregnant is not a reason to put off college for a year. Many pregnant women are able attend college successfully.

Signed: TeenHealthFX