Self-Confidence & Self-Esteem Issues / Question
Published: August 14, 2002
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I have a lot of things running through my head right now. My school year just ended and I failed Geometry. I talked to my dad over the phone about it and he wasn't that mad about it. But that's where the question comes in. My dad and me have always been great friends. Nearly everything I do during the day is to try and make him proud of me some way but to this day I can't thing of one thing he has to be proud of me. I don't play sports, I don't pass my classes, the only thing I do is play video games and read and write stories. I'm not really good at anything. In short: I hate myself. But I do have a very good life, and most of the reason is because of my dad. The things I get I don't deserve. I know many people who deserve the things I have. This has been a long letter and it would be longer but I'm not going to do that.
Signed: Failed Geometry - Need My Dad To Be Proud
Dear Failed Geometry - Need My Dad To Be Proud,
TeenHealthFX is concerned about how down you are feeling about yourself. It must be very hard for you to constantly be trying to please your father, feeling as if you do not deserve the things you have and failing a class.
TeenHealthFX did not hear you say that your father wants or expects you to excel in sports and academics. If this is so, understanding the source of the pressure you feel will be key to helping you feel better because it sounds as if wanting to please your father in areas that are not your strong suit is having a negative impact on you. It is important to realize that not everyone can play sports or excel in every class. Writing stories and reading are excellent activities. Also, your appreciation of all of the positive things in your life is also a quality that you should be very proud of.
It seems like your feelings of sadness have become too much to handle on your own. TeenHealthFX strongly recommends that you get some help and talk to someone about what is going on. Start by talking with your father and letting him know that you are down (show him this question and answer). Ask him if he can help you get help from a counselor or therapist.
If you live in northern New Jersey and would like help finding a therapist, you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400 for an appointment.
Although you did not mention it, sometimes people who feel down think about suicide. If, at any time, you feel this way, contact your local hospital or call 9-1-1 immediately. If you live in Northern NJ, you can contact Atlantic Health System's 24-hour Crisis Hotline at (973) 540.0100. If you live outside Northern New Jersey, call the National Hope Line at (800) SUICIDE.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
Persons aged 15-24, who represent only 14% of the 
