TeenHealthFX - Answers - Can't Stand Counselor

Cutting / Question
Published: October 9, 2003

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I have been depressed for about three years. It wasn't too bad at first, but this past year I've been thinking about suicide. I finally told my mom, so now I'm on medicine and I'm seeing a counselor. Unfortunately, the medicine doesn't seem to work; I've been taking Paxil since June, they've increased my dosage and I still feel like crap. My counselor doesn't help either; I can't stand her! While I usually am not thinking of suicide after I see her, that's because I feel more like putting a couple of knives in her. I feel like I need Anger Management Therapy after I see her. But the real reason I'm writing this is because it's gotten so bad I've tried cutting myself. The only reason I haven't yet is because it's worst when I'm around other people. I've even tried cutting right in front of them, but never have anything sharp enough. I don't know who to talk to: I hate my counselor, I'm uncomfortable around my mom and all my friends think you have to be psycho to cut yourself. Please help me.

Signed: Can't Stand Counselor - Strikeout

Dear Can't Stand Counselor - Strikeout,

TeenHealthFX is sorry to hear that your experience with therapy so far has been so negative, but please do not give up. You should talk to your counselor and be honest about your feelings. A good therapist will be interested in what you have to say and try and work through the issues that are causing you to feel angry. Be open to the fact that your anger may indicate that you may be touching on some significant issues that are at the heart of what is troubling you. If you feel that you are not getting anywhere or your therapist is not respecting your feelings then it would be a good idea to find another treatment professional. Everybody has different personalities and sometimes they simply clash. The important thing is that you find a comfortable situation where you can get the help you need.

There are many medications that are used for the treatment of depression. Because there are many variables involved in the selection, doctors may have to try different medications or combinations to find the one(s) that work best. If Paxil has not brought you any relief from your symptoms then talk to your doctor about trying a different medication. The more involved you are in your treatment the greater chance for success.

Many people who are depressed or under severe pressure resort to "cutting" as a way of relieving tension or expressing anger. While this may seem like it provides some relief, there are many other ways that can provide healthy long-term relief of these symptoms. People who are involved in "cutting" seem to go through a cycle. Pressure builds up, they cut themselves and then they experience guilt, remorse or shame. They tell themselves they will not do it again but when the depression deepens or stress builds up the cycle returns. You also have to be very careful that these cuts do not get infected. A severe infection from a "cutting" can lead to serious medical problems. For some additional information about self-injury you can check this link: Self-Abuse Finally Ends (S.A.F.E.) Alternatives. Also TeenHealthFX has a whole section on cutting in our FX Answers section under Emotional help.

If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 9-1-1 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern New Jersey you can also call the crisis hotline from Morristown Memorial hospital at 973-540-0100. Outside this area call the Suicide & Crisis Hotline, 1-800-999-9999, 24 hours, 7 days a week

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 973-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.

Signed: TeenHealthFX