TeenHealthFX - Answers - Saw Friend's AOL Profile

Concerned About A Friend / Concerned About A Friend's Influence On Me / Question
Published: November 20, 2002

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I was talking to my friend over aol instant messenger, and I looked at her profile. What I saw really shook me up...here it is: "Y do u guyz treat me like this U dont f****** care if i cut, u dont care if i take too many, u wuldnt care if i died wuld u? seemz like u dont care, one of these days ur gonna turn around and i wont b there y do u ignore me until tha point where i say im gonna kill myself? Is that what i have to do for attention? Cuz im not gonna b doin that all tha time im sorri if i scare u but threatenin 2 kill myself for attention isnt how im gonna do it. I hope that next time u hear that u'll think twice! xxxxxx u b**** at me everyday when u pull up my sleeve and see it all there, thnx c u look out fo me gurrl but lately thingz have been different ppl r ignoring me, my bro hates me, xxxxxx & xxxxxx rnt friendz ne more, i feel left out in thingz i feel like i have 2 die 2 actually feel like im there...y r u ppl puttin me thru this? ever night I sit on my floor with a razor & bottle of pillz crying.." i'm so scared for her. I love her with all my heart. I was gonna call 1-800-suicide, but if she finds out that i called them she'll hate me! Also, if my mom sees that I called a suicide hotline on the phone bill, she will totally freak!! I love my friend with all my heart, and i feel guilty for not realizing how unhappy she was. PLEASE..my friend needs help before its too late, and i'm the only one who can help her!!

Signed: Saw Friend's AOL Profile - Help!

Dear Saw Friend's AOL Profile - Help!,

TeenHealthFX is glad that you wrote. Your friend sounds very depressed and needs help as soon as possible. Your friend seems to be asking for help - otherwise she would not have posted her feelings in such detail on her profile. She needs to get help immediately.

You really need to get a responsible adult involved at this point - these issues are not something you can handle on your own. Your friend needs to work on these painful issues with the help of a professional through therapy and counseling. Her parents need to know so they can get her the help she needs. So, the right thing to do, whether or not your friend gets mad at you, is to talk to an adult about this - you can to try talking to your parents, a school nurse, guidance counselor, or a teacher to let them know what your friend wrote. Better yet, print out a copy of her profile for them to see.

If you are unable to talk to a trusted adult and get professional help for her and live in New Jersey, call the 24-hour CRISIS HOTLINE at (973) 540.0100. If you live outside northern New Jersey, call the National Hope Line Network at (800) SUICIDE.

Again, please remember that you are not responsible for your friend or her thoughts or actions. When people are depressed they may not be thinking clearly and logically. When things get really rough, they need outside, professional help - all you can do is assist her in getting that help as soon as possible.

Signed: TeenHealthFX