ME & Relationships / Question
Published: November 24, 2008
Dear TeenHealthFX,
Im 15 years old and I met this girl at a festival and I really liked her because she was from where I was from (from the other side of the world) and she was cute. But I asked her for her number and she said she doesn't give out her number to people she doesn't know so i gave her my number. She never texted me back but I did find her on myspace. So i emailed her and asked if she wasn't interested in me she should just say it. But she said that she just wasn't looking and her parents don't let her have boyfriends, matter fact don't even let her talk to guys. But getting to my question, I want to talk to this girl and get to know her. But I don't know if she thinks I'm annoying, stalking her or what and I'm scared to talk to her again because she might not write back. So how can I get her to be interested again and try to talk to me so she can also get to know me.
Signed: How Do I Pursue A Girl Who May Not Be Interested?
Dear How Do I Pursue A Girl Who May Not Be Interested?,
Asking people out, trying to build relationships, and figuring out the best way to pursue a crush are all really tough things to do – so FX can appreciate your dilemma. As far as how this girl is feeling, it is possible that she is just not interested and is saying that she isn’t looking for a relationship right now, and that her parents won’t let her have a boyfriend, as a way of more gently letting you down. It is also possible that she is not at a place right now where she wants a boyfriend and that her parents really have placed restrictions on her when it comes to being in contact with guys.
Either way, what FX suggests is that you email this girl and let her know that you understand that she isn’t interested in dating right now and that her parents do not want her having a boyfriend. Then tell her that you will respectfully not continue to contact her, but that when and if she is interested in dating and is allowed to have a boyfriend, that you would very much like her to get in contact with you – and leave her with your email address and/or phone number. If she contacts you at some point in the future, that will probably feel wonderful for you. If she doesn’t, remember that there are plenty of “fish in the sea,” as they say, and set your sights on another cute girl.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
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