Bookmark and Share

Dad Hit Me Since I Was 9

Published: May 14, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,
It's stopped now. But ever since I was about 9 to 10ish my dad has hit me and my brother. It stopped around 13 and I'm almost 16 now. I can't really do anything about it now, we've tried in the past, but phsychologists/therapists don't listen to children very well. Well, at least the 4 I went to. My dad use to drag me down the stairs and I use to get carpet burns all over my back. I've been yanked by my ankle and dragged off my bed and pushed down and kicked in the stomach. I've been whipped in the back with a belt because my dad listened to my brother's side of the story before he even listened to mine, and turned out my brother was lying and all he had to do for punishment was go to bed and I get an unemotional "Sorry". Actually a couple months ago my dad slapped me across the face and my mom strangled me. I don't know why my dad did this in the past, I wasn't a terrible or bad child. My mom is always talking about child protective services, they scare the wit out of my parents, so they usually made us keep it secret from the authorities.
Signed: Dad Hit Me Since I Was 9

Dear Dad Hit Me Since I Was 9,


TeenHealthFX is very concerned about the physical abuse you have gone through, and are still going through (if you were recently slapped by your father and strangled by your mother). What is equally concerning is that you have not felt helped or protected in any way by the various therapists you have worked with. If you are currently in therapy, FX thinks that you need to tell your therapist that you have not felt heard and that you are upset that he/she hasn’t done more to help your or protect you from this living situation. If your therapist does not act on what you say, FX thinks that it is very important for you to tell another trusted adult about this history of abuse so that someone can intervene in the situation. If you are worried about how your parents might react to your telling someone about this (for example, that they would become violent with you), let the adult you are talking to know about this so that they can go about things in a way that protects your immediate and long-term safety. If the first adult you tell doesn’t listen or do anything, than keep telling people until someone does do something. You can tell a school counselor, teacher, private therapist, extended family member, neighbor, or parents of a friend – anyone who you see as trustworthy and someone who will act in a way that helps and protects you.


You can also contact child protective services in your area. If you live in NJ, the agency is called DYFS and can be reached at 1-800-NJ-ABUSE. If you live outside of NJ, you can find the child abuse agency in your area in the phone book or online. You can also contact the Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-792-8610, 24 hours, 7 days a week. This hotline is for reporting physical or sexual abuse and to get help.


Adult intervention is critical in this situation. An adult needs to ensure that you and your brother are safe from this kind of physical harm in your home, and counseling could be very beneficial for both of you as, understandably, there are many negative emotions and thoughts to be worked through. In addition, both of your parents need help so that they can learn how to control their anger and stop their abusive behaviors. So keep telling trusted adults until someone helps you – and know that things can get better.

Signed: TeenHealthFX