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Where Is The Vaginal Opening Located And Why Am I In Pain During Sex?

Published: May 14, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I'm a 19 year old virgin and i've been wanting to have vaginal intercourse but it REALLY hurts.My boyfriend tried sticking his finger in there but it feels pretty uncomfortable and I usually tell him to stop, does vaginal intercourse & losing your virginity suppose to hurt that much? And on the other note, where exactly is the vaginal opening located at? Can the penis accidentally slide inside the wrong place inside the vagina and tear something?
Signed: Where Is The Vaginal Opening Located And Why Am I In Pain During Sex?

Dear Where Is The Vaginal Opening Located And Why Am I In Pain During Sex?,

 

It is possible that intercourse and/or fingering can feel uncomfortable for some women if they are feeling stressed or anxious and their muscles are all tensed up. The key here would be to ensure that you feel emotionally ready to be sexually active and, if you are, to find a way to relax the mind and body. However, the pain you are describing sounds more intense than this. That said, FX thinks that you should meet with a gynecologist for a physical exam to find out if there are any medical issues that need to be addressed. You should not be in any kind of extreme pain during vaginal intercourse. If you are, it is possible that there is not enough lubrication to make intercourse feel comfortable or pleasurable, it is possible that you are not relaxed and your muscles in that area are tensed up making pleasurable intercourse more difficult, or it is possible that there is some medical issue that needs to be addressed. Medical issues that can cause a woman to feel pain during intercourse can include: vaginal yeast infection, pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), vaginal dryness, certain STDs, problems with the cervix, uterus, or ovaries, and more.

 

The only places around the genital area that the penis could penetrate would be the vaginal opening or the anus. Because the anus is not designed for penetration, many people do find anal sex uncomfortable or painful – if you and your boyfriend think you are attempting vaginal sex, but are really attempting anal sex, you would most likely feel some pain or discomfort. However, FX thinks you would know if the two of you were continually trying to attempt vaginal sex, but were accidentally having anal sex.

 

After you have met with a doctor to find out if there is any underlying medical issue that needs to be treated, and you have received any necessary treatment, FX recommends that you take a hand-held mirror and explore your genital area so you have a sense of where everything is. You can even self-stimulate so that you learn what feels good to you – and then you can show your boyfriend what feels good to you. Some patient exploring may be needed here for both of you before you attempt intercourse again. To see a drawing of the female genitalia to give you a sense of where everything is located please look at the Planned Parenthood Having Your Period article as well as How Down There Works.  

 

FX does want you to remember the importance of practicing safer sex. Please use a new condom each time you have vaginal, anal, or oral sex to protect against unwanted pregnancies and transmission of STDs. In addition, FX also generally recommends that women are on some kind of back-up birth control method, such as the pill or patch, if they are sexually active on a fairly regular basis.

 

To set up a physical exam for yourself, and to learn more about sex and safer sex, meet with a medical health professional. Remember that it is important for women to have yearly gyn exams starting at the age of 18 or whenever they first become sexually active – whichever comes first.

 

If you don't have a doctor and live in northern New Jersey, you can call the Adolescent/Young Adult Center for Health at 973-971-6475 for an appointment. You can also contact your local teen health center or Planned Parenthood, or call your insurance company for a list of in-network gynecologists or adolescent medicine specialists.

Signed: TeenHealthFX

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