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Want To Stay Who I Was

Published: December 30, 2014
Dear TeenHealthFX,

Hello. I’m 16 y.o. guy. There are a lot of questions on this website which are similar to mine but, still, my problem is slightly different. I always thought that I was gay. My whole life I was attracted, both sexually and romantically, only to men. I accepted it at the age of 13. I read gay books, watch men on the Internet and so on. I never felt anything towards girls. All of them were the same to me. But a few months ago I started to be unsure. I don’t know how to describe my feelings. Now they’re changing all the time. One moment I think that I’m gay, another - straight, sometimes - asexual. The problem is I don't want to change, I want to stay gay. Now I keep saying to myself that I like only boys and my sexual attraction to women (if it even exists) is just mere curiosity but, nevertheless, every day I have a depression. Also I don't have as much sexual desire as I used to. Please answer my question. I’m so very tired of my situation. I don't know what I should do but I know that the only thing I want is to stay who I always was.


Dear Want To Stay Who I Was,

You are the same person you have always been. You are at an age where sexuality and sexual identity comes to the forefront of development. Since you have looked at some of the questions on TeenHealthFX about sexuality, you will recognize that many teens deal with the uncertainty regarding sexuality. Your situation might be “slightly different,” but the core issue is the same: coming to an understanding of yourself as a sexual being.

 

You have not changed; you are dealing with some feelings that were not there before. The struggle is that this can cause some confusion where there was none before. In the end you will come to understand who you are as a person, including your sexuality. Then you just need to continue on in life, loving the person you are.

 

 

Signed: TeenHealthFX

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