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Losing Respect From Texting

Published: November 01, 2014
Dear TeenHealthFX,

For the past few months i have been sexting this guy that is one of my really good friends and lately i have been feeling hes been losing respect for me because of it. i really like him and want him to still like me but these days unless we're talking about sex conversation is awkward. i really dont want to lose him and need to find a way to gain back his respect. at the same time though talking this way is something he says he really likes about me. im really confused. please help. thanks.

Signed: Losing Respect From Texting

Dear Losing Respect From Texting,

 Any relationship that is one dimensional is usually very hard to maintain. If the only time that you feel you connect with this person is through Sexting then that should tell you something about the relationship. You are also getting some mixed messages here as well. You are worried about him losing respect for you for the one behavior that he has been encouraging you to do. It is entirely possible that you are getting uncomfortable with the Sexting because it puts you in a vulnerable position. He could forward these messages or just be using them for his own sexual gratification. You have been in contact with him for months but it doesn’t seem like there is any other major components to the relationship besides the Sexting. 

The best way to find out how he feels about you is to take this part out of your relationship and see what is left. This will give the relationship a chance to blossom or it will end because there is nothing left to sustain it. It will also give you a chance to judge how much respect this young man has for you.  If he cares about you then he should be able to show it by taking an interest in you and who you are. If he loses interest then it would appear he was only interested in mainly one area. It also gives you an opportunity for you to evaluate the whole Sexting issue. Is it you are really comfortable with were you just trying to make the other person happy. If you discover that he really was a shallow person, then you really don’t have to worry about “losing him” because he was never there in the first place. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel comfortable and safe and not worried if the other person respects you. Respect should be a given and something that is demonstrated over time not just with words but with actions as well. 

Should the relationship end, it would be important to remind this person that you expect that all of your communications be kept confidential. Not only is it the right thing to do but if he were to break that bond then he could be subject to serious criminal charges especially if you are under the age of 18. This can also be the case when “Sexting Without Pictures.” 

 Here are some pretty good reasons not to engage in Sexting or email naked pictures of yourself to others, no matter how close you are, and even if you are in a serious relationship. 

  • Once you hit send, the contents of your message are out of your control.
  • Your picture could be forwarded, saved or posted at any time now or in the future.
  • If you break-up with a partner, or get into a fight with a friend, that person could share your picture with other people as a form of revenge.
  • Though you might feel comfortable sharing a naked picture with someone today, you might feel really differently tomorrow.

 

Signed: TeenHealthFX

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