Is Running Away a Good Idea

Published: November 30, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,

Is running away a good idea? my mom is always yelling at me and it make me hurt all the time. I’m always grounded and I never see my friends. sometimes I feel like I have nothing to live for. I cut myself frequently but when I told my mom she told me to never do it again or she will throw me in a mental institution. but its my only way to deal with this. so I kept going and I make sure she will never find out. my mom always calls me a brat and saying I don't deserve her. I considered suicide many times but I cant bring myself to end my life. but even then my mom is always so FUSTRATED at me. I have severe ADHD so I can see why that might be stressful for her. would it be better for everyone if I ran away and simply just disappeared?

Dear Is Running Away a Good Idea,

TeenHealthFX can understand why you would want to escape from this situation but it really is not a solution. Your mom seems to have trouble coping with her own life and takes out her frustrations on you. The sad part is that she cannot see how hurtful her behavior is. Her response to your cutting behavior was inappropriate and must have been hurtful. When a person resorts to cutting as a way of coping, they don’t get thrown into a “mental institution,” they are given help.

This situation is way to overwhelming for you to deal with on your own. For some reason mom is not able to give you the support and help that you need. To be fair, your mother may be having trouble dealing with her own emotions which doesn’t leave much for you. It is important that you reach out to an adult that you trust (you didn’t mention anything about your dad) or a counselor in your school and let them know how much you have been struggling. The goal would be for that person to work with your mother so that you, her and any other family members can get the help and support that you need. Individual counseling would help find healthier ways to cope so that you don’t feel cutting is your only option. The therapist could also work with you to make sure that your ADHD is being managed in the best way. Family therapy would reduce the level of stress in the family and improve communication.

You are an important person and you disappearing would be tragic.

If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern New Jersey you can also call the crisis hotline from Atlantic Health at 973-540-0100. Outside this area call the Suicide & Crisis Hotline, 1-800-999-9999, 24 hours, 7 days a week

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.




Signed: TeenHealthFX