Scared Little Girl

Published: October 09, 2015
Dear Scared Little Girl,

Dear Little People In My Computer, I'm not sure if my current situation is serious or not, but I don't feel happy in my own home. I am a type 1 diabetic and a girl with ADD and i feel sometimes my parents forget i have problems, even if they are minor. Speaking about my parents, they don't show me any affection when i need it, they yell at me a lot, they overreact, and i feel alone a lot. Im threatened and I'm criticized a lot by them and i don't like it. I have had to tell them on multiple occasions that i feel that they are not treating me fairly. I have thought about suicide and cutting but I'm too scared to go through with it. I have not told my friends about this but i think they might be catching on even if i don't want them to. Im scarrd I'm underrating or overreacting to this. Please help me understand why i feel this way and tell me if there is a way to fix it. Sincerely, ScarredLittleGirl

Dear Scared Little Girl,

TeenHealthFX thinks it is very understandable that you feel the way you do. Children and teenagers naturally want to feel love, support, and connectedness with their parents and caregivers. If you feel that your parents have consistently not been affectionate, and have been threatening and critical with you, then it would make sense that this would affect you emotionally.

FX thinks that it is very important for you to reach out for help with this, given the pain you are in and given the issues in your relationships with your parents. FX recommends that you meet with a reputable therapist, such as a clinical social worker or clinical psychologist, for individual sessions where you can have a safe and private place to discuss these issues. FX also recommends that you and your parents go to family therapy to address the issues in the relationship. You could tell your parents that you would like to be in therapy. You could mention individual and family, or start with individual and then have your individual therapist advocate for you to be in family therapy as well. If your parents are resistant to the idea of your being in any kind of therapy, then it is important for you to tell someone what is going on so that person can advocate on your behalf. Some good people to start with would be a school counselor or your family doctor.

There are people out there who can be helpful to this. And there are people out there who can offer you to support and care that you need. So please do not try and deal with this alone – reach out for help as soon as possible.

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.

If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern New Jersey you can also call the crisis hotline from Morristown Memorial hospital at 973-540-0100. Outside this area call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-2433), available 24 hours a day, or the Suicide & Crisis Hotline, 1-800-999-9999, 24 hours, 7 days a week.