I'm a first-year college student. I am female and have always considered myself heterosexual. However, I have a crush on my professor who is a woman. It is a stable situation; there is no danger of me telling her or anyone about my feelings (I am aware there is a chance it could get her in trouble). But, I feel like I am obsessing about her too much, and I don't know how to stop. She is the most beautiful person I have ever seen in my entire life. I admire her 120%. I want to emulate everything about her. It helps that she happens to be in the same field I want to go into. It isn't that I have a problem with the fact that I might not be completely straight. I just want to stop crushing on this person. It's humiliating when I have to talk to her because I get a lump in my throat and butterflies in my stomach SO INTENSELY. My hands shake! It's embarrassing. Should I seek professional help? Or is there anything I can do to make myself stop being so infatuated with her, other than trying to distract myself with my studies and socializing with people my own age more (I have already tried these)?
Signed: How Do I Stop This Infatuation with My Professor?
Dear How Do I Stop This Infatuation with My Professor?,
TeenHealthFX can appreciate that this is feeling stressful for you. We think that it might help for you to speak to a reputable mental health professional, such as a clinical social worker or clinical psychologist. It would be helpful for you to have someone to talk about this with so you can figure out what is driving these feelings and ways in which to feel calmer when you are interacting with her.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.
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