I Need Advice

Published: January 06, 2020
Dear TeenHealthFX,
Hello. I am an 18 year old high school senior with a kinda weird problem. Back when I was in middle school I met a great girl that was unique in every way. We quickly became great friends and we dated for a while. Then we broke up and then got back together and then broke up a final time early on in my sophomore year. We haven't spoken in the two years that have passed since and I have barely even thought of her until recently. Over the past month I have found myself suddenly missing her like crazy out of the blue and I don't know what caused it. She moved to another school last year and I had no real reminders of her. It's really painful for me. She really was unique and hard to forget about. Do you have any advice or anything you can give? Before you ask, my school does not have any real counselling services and I live out in a small town in the middle of nowhere where I don't really have any options of talking to anyone. People are also very chatty and nosey here so even if I did, word would get out and people would talk about me badly. My parents are very conservative and would rather not hear my problems. I also don't live anywhere near Northern New Jersey.
Signed: I Need Advice

Dear I Need Advice,

TeenHealthFX is sorry to hear about what you are currently going through. We do not want to assume, but it sounds like you may be wondering about missed opportunities since you are graduating high school this year. It is normal to think about the past and imagine what life would be like if things went differently. In addition, it is also common to be nervous about what life will be like after high school. 

Perhaps it would be a good idea to reach out to her? Even though you have not talked to her in a long time, you can keep it low key and send her a text to say hi and see how she is doing. By doing so, this can also help clarify your feelings about her and help you decide what your next steps will be.   

In addition, talking to someone else can really help put things into perspective and help you understand why you may be feeling the way you do. Since you mention not having a counselor to talk to, it would be a good idea to talk to a trusted friend, another trusted adult, teacher, or school nurse. If you really do not want to discuss your problems with anyone, another option would be to journal and write down your feelings to help you process them.  Try to stay positive, things will get better!  

Signed: TeenHealthFX