What is the difference between control and love?
This is a commonly asked question and unfortunately, a lot of people do not know the differences, but it is important to know so you can have safe and healthy relationships in your life.
Love supports someone’s decisions, growth, and happiness. Even if that means it is not something you want or something you would do. If everyone is safe in context, support is key. An example of love is “I am sad you are going far for college, but I am so happy for you and will be here for you no matter what!”
On the other hand, control is making someone act, dress, feel, or think in a certain way. People who control others usually want to feel powerful, in charge, or make themselves feel better. It is important to remember that individuality, the quality or characteristics of a person that distinguishes them from others, is healthy in all kinds of relationships. An example of controlling behavior is someone telling you what you can and cannot wear.
If someone in your life is constantly trying to tell you how to think, feel, act, or dress, then it is best to slowly remove that person from your life. That is not love, that is control. If you are not sure how to distance yourself from that individual, then it is best to reach out to a trusted adult or your doctor. You can provide them with more details of your situation, and they can guide you.
