I Lied and Told Him I'm Not a Virgin
Some bleeding can occur for a woman after having sex for the first time. However, if the bleeding doesn’t stop, gets worse, or is accompanied by any pain or other concerning symptoms, then it would be a good idea to meet with your doctor.
As for not being upfront about being a virgin, TeenHealthFX is curious what makes you feel ashamed about this? It would be helpful for you to think about why you this bothers you so you feel clear about it and you can explain it to this guy. If you are having trouble figuring out what the shame is about, or you need some support and guidance in making healthy sexual decisions for the future, then FX suggests that you meet with a reputable therapist.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.
TeenHealthFX would also like to encourage you to speak to your doctor about safer sex precautions for the future. Doctors generally recommend that teens and young adults who choose to be sexually active use condoms each and every time they have sex to protect against unwanted pregnancies and the transmission of STDs, as well as a back-up method of birth control such as the pill or birth control shot. Your doctor can make the best recommendations for you and discuss with you how to use properly use birth control to maximize its effectiveness.
If you don't have a doctor and live in northern New Jersey, you can call the Adolescent/Young Adult Center for Health at 973-971-5199 for an appointment with an adolescent medicine specialist or contact your local teen health center or Planned Parenthood. A Planned Parenthood health center is a good option if you have concerns about cost or confidentiality issues. You can also contact your insurance company for a list of in-network providers.
FX also suggests that you check out the links in our Resource of the Month: Planned Parenthood Resources on Safer Sex so that you can learn about sexual readiness, how pregnancy happens, pregnancy tests, emergency contraception, birth control, STDs and more. The more educated you are about these topics, the more likely you will make healthy decisions for yourself when it comes to your sexual health.
